Use AI to make a decision, rehearse a hard talk or revise

Use the first when you’re stuck between two options, the second before a conversation you’re dreading, and the third when you need to learn something and remember it.

1. Decide between two options without going round in circles

Describe both options to an AI app, say the three things that matter most to you, and make it argue for each one before it recommends. The point is not its answer. The point is how you feel when you read it.

Write the three things that matter

Not ten. Three. Cost, commute, whether you will still like it in a year. If you cannot get to three, that is the real problem and the prompt will surface it.

Paste this

I am deciding between two options and keep going round in circles. Here they are:

Option A: [describe it, including the bits you are unsure about]
Option B: [same]

The three things that matter most to me, in order: [1], [2], [3].

Do this in order:
1. Make the strongest honest case for A, in five lines.
2. Make the strongest honest case for B, in five lines.
3. Tell me which one my own three priorities point to, and how clearly.
4. Tell me the one question I should answer before deciding, if there is one.

Do not hedge, and do not give me a table.

Read your reaction, not just the answer

If it says B and you feel relief, it is B. If it says B and you immediately start arguing, you wanted A all along, and now you know why. Either way the loop is over.

Two flats: Elm Street or Dock Road. Priorities: cost, commute, quiet

For Elm Street: $200 a month cheaper. A 15-minute walk to work. A bit dated inside.

For Dock Road: newer and brighter. Nearer the shops. Costs more, and the bus takes 40 minutes.

Your priorities point to Elm Street, clearly on cost and commute, and unclear on quiet.

One question: is Elm Street on a busy road? Quiet is your third priority, and that could change the answer.

Notice your own reaction to the lean before you think about why.

If both cases sound equally convincing, your three priorities were not really in order. Reorder them and run it again.

2. Rehearse a hard conversation before you have it

Tell it who the other person is and what you need to say. Make it play them, properly, with the reply you are afraid of. Have the conversation three times. The real one is the fourth, and you have already heard the worst of it.

Set it up honestly

The rehearsal only works if the other person is drawn accurately. Describe them as they are, not as you wish they were: defensive, busy, kind but evasive, whatever it is.

Paste this

I need to have a difficult conversation and I want to rehearse it. You play the other
person. Here is who they are and how they tend to react: [two or three honest lines].

Here is what I need to say: [one or two lines].

Play them realistically, including the reply I am most afraid of. Do not make it easy and
do not break character to reassure me. I will start. When I say "pause", step out of the
role and tell me one thing I did well and one thing to change.

Then say your opening line, and keep going. Use voice mode if you can; hearing yourself say it is most of the practice.

Run it three times

First time, you will say too much. Second time, you will find the one sentence that matters. Third time, say that sentence first. Then ask for your opening line and the one thing not to say, and stop rehearsing.

Asking my manager Priya for a raise, plus the prompt above

Priya: Thanks for coming in, Sam. I have ten minutes. What’s this about?

(You say your opening line. Then she replies:)

Priya: I hear you, but budgets are frozen until next year. Can we look at this again in the spring?

It should push back the way a busy manager really would. If it agrees too quickly, say harder.

If the rehearsal felt easy, the other person was drawn too kindly. Go back to the set-up and tell the truth about them.

3. Turn your notes into a quiz that actually tests you

Paste your notes. Ask for one question at a time, answer from memory, get marked honestly, and have the ones you missed come back. It is the study method that works, with the boring part done for you.

Give it the material

Paste the notes, attach the chapter, or photograph the page. A few pages is ideal; a whole book is a desk too full to work on.

Paste this

Quiz me on the material below. Rules:

- One question at a time. Wait for my answer before the next.
- Mix recall ("what is") with understanding ("why does").
- Mark honestly: right, partly right with what was missing, or wrong with the correct
  answer in one line. Do not be kind about it.
- Keep a list of the ones I got wrong or partly right, and ask them again, reworded,
  after every five questions.
- After 15 questions, tell me the three things I clearly do not know yet.

Start now.

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[notes]

Answer before you look

The whole value is in trying to remember before you see the answer. If you peek, it is reading, and reading feels like learning without being it.

My answer to question 3: 'Chlorophyll makes the leaf green.'

Partly right. Chlorophyll does make leaves green, but you missed what it does: it absorbs sunlight so the plant can make sugar. I’ll ask this one again after question 5.

Question 4. Why does a plant need water for photosynthesis?

It marks you honestly, keeps a list of misses, and asks one question at a time.

If every answer is “correct”, the questions are too easy; say “harder, more why questions”.